Essay #21 - Friendship

2^nd DRAFT FOR GRADING

Cassy

English 8

Mr. Salsich

5/1/10

Friendships: The Everlasting Fondness That Completes Everything

Dear Reader:

This is an essay that reminds you of how much your friends mean to you.  There will be four genres describing the laughs that are always there and the worries that are never there.  This essay will consist of an expository paragraph, a free verse, a haiku, and an interview.  I hope you find what friendship really is in this essay.

                                                                                                                 Sincerely,

Cassy

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Friendship

Friendship is a bond where you are accepted for who you are.

No judgments,

No hate,

No jealousy,

‘Tis love that no one can break.

Friends cannot be separated,

Text,

Phone call,

E-mail,

That is how we keep in touch when we are not exactly next to each other.

We have been through it all,

Since the beginning of our friendship we have told each other many secrets we were scared to share,

We vow not to tell anyone.

We get together every chance we can get.

We sit next to each other in class every chance we can get.

Eager smiles on our faces welcome the giggles that come out of our lips.

Giggles that risk the respect of the teacher in class,

Giggles that make our day only better,

Giggles that take in doubts we had on the possible boring day.

We risk it all.

Through the fall,

The silly costumes we put on for Halloween.

Through the winter,

Where the big group hugs keep us warm together.

Through the spring,

Where we can feel the joy of warm air we breathe in as we giggle about inside jokes.

Through the summer,

‘O the days we lay beside each other tanning on the beach in the heat of the sun.

These seasons are all similar in one way.

We have kept the friendship everlasting throughout the years.

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TS Romeo and Juliet is a love story, but often love begins with a friendship.  SD Benvolio, Romeo’s cousin, realizes that Romeo seems lost lately because, “blind is his love and best befits the dark” (Shakespeare, 69).  CM His love for Juliet faded any of his consciousness that his friends were still around him.  CM If Romeo opens his eyes a little wider there might be people who want to help him with his love problem.  SD Romeo met Juliet at her party and they barely knew each other but became fond of each other quickly.  CM The first few minutes of meeting each other they become friends. CM Because Romeo’s lips poured out gallons of compliments of her beauty, things changed to love.  CS Friendships are a new beginning, friendships can lead to love, and friendships can end with or without a happy ending.

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Friends heal everything,

They fill in the missing pieces,

They make us complete.

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Interview (Q&A): A Woman Who Makes Friends for a Living

This is a woman who makes friends for a living.  Is it wrong or right?

Q: What exactly is your job?

A: Well, people call me with a problem with a loved one who seems lonely.  I help them find new friends to make their social life easier.

Q: Do you think that is cheating the experience away by setting them up with people they would enjoy to hang out with?

A: Yes and no.  The journey to meet new friends makes the experience worthwhile when you find friends on your own.  If you notice that someone you know is having trouble coping with his or her social life it is okay to call out for help.  Everyone needs a little push sometimes to get to things they want, such as a friendship.

Q: Thank you for letting us interview with you about your unique job.

A: Always a pleasure.  Remember that if you need the little extra push to get a friendship call me.

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 Self Assessment

1. One writing issue I am continuing to work on:

One writing issue that I still continue to work on is finding all my mistakes.  I do believe over this school year that I have almost fixed this problem.

2. One strong point I see in this writing:

I thought my Q&A was very creative and different.  I also am really proud of my long free verse poem.

3. One possible weak point I see in this writing:

I am afraid that some people might be a little confused on the Q&A.

4. The grade I would give myself:

I think I would give my self a B+ on this essay because I though my free verse was especially excellent.  I also thought that my expository paragraph made a lot more sense than some of my past expository paragraphs.

Essay #20 - Family

2^ND DRAFT FOR GRADING

Cassy

English 8

Mr. Salisch

4/27/10

Family: A Complicated Puzzle

1.  A family should never consist of anger.  2. Anger does sometimes seep through small cracks that are in the household.  3. To be a family we forgive each other for our mistakes.  4. Forgiveness is in all of the hearts we seek in our families.

TS Love lies in the light air that never consists of loneliness (alliteration). SD Even though my parents are divorced I am proud that they still keep in contact with each other. CM I think the situation would become much more hectic (apt. thesaurus word) if they didn’t cooperate. CM Instead we all work together to get all of my clothes and toiletries to bring to and from the houses. SD Helping, caring, thoughtful, and always busy, my parents fit this choice of words perfectly (parallelism with participles). CM Sometimes I do not understand how they have the time to be so attentive while they have work to think about. CM Seeing what they have to do as grownups is impressive and I can see it takes a lot of consideration to have to get this far in life. SD Even though sometimes my parents and I do not get along we usually forgive each other, which I think is very polite. CM I think forgiveness is a big part of being in a family you have to learn to forgive each other in an unselfish way. CM If we didn’t forgive each other in my family I am sure that none of us would be a happy and courteous family that we are today. CS My parents are there to give me tips, to help me with something if I am having trouble, to be the guidance of my cautious life choices.

 TS If my family is a kindred, that means in the future they will let me make my life choices as an adult. SD I do not know where I will be in the future, but my brood will have to approve of it since it is what I want. CM If my parents really love me they will let me make my decisions, "and, but thou love me, let the find me here"(Shakespeare, 75).  CM The parents of Romeo and Juliet would never approve of such a thing as marriage between their two hateful families.  CM Every parent should be happy if their child is happy where they are in life. SD Hate does exist in the world, an unpleasant feeling, this painful word should not exist, and it does not exist in my family (loose sentence). CM Hate in blood should not exist against other families: "'tis but thy name that is my enemy" (Shakespeare, 71).  CM Hate does not seem like it can ever separate Romeo and Juliet from their love. CM I am glad that hate is never used against each other in my house.  CM I believe I would be a very different person if hatred subsisted (apt. thesaurus word) in my household.  CS My family lifestyle does not consist of hatred, sadness

1. In Romeo and Juliet the lovebirds have learned to deal with both the families’ hatred.  2. It is good to have people in your family that follow their heart no matter what happens.  3. These people can help keep some families sturdy enough to get by little problems. 4. Forgiveness in our lives inside and outside our household is a healthy thing.

Self Assessment:

1. I still am having trouble with finding my mistakes.
2. I thought both of my special effects were well thought out.
3. Throughout this essay I believe that some parts are not clear to me.
4. I believe I would give myself a B-, I do not believe this was quite as good as my past essays.

Poem From the Heart

Dissecting Love

What is love?

Is it a small peck on the cheek?

Or is it just the bond within your family?

Love is the hugs you give your dog.

Love is the smile you pass to your friends

Receiving that smile can always tape a great mood on you.

Love is when you comfort a friend when losing a loved one,

Love is the blush on a girl's face that is caused by a compliment,

The blush is as red as raspberries.

Love is not the rejection of trying to strike up a conversation.

Love is carried in our arms like school books

Love is passed on like a highly contagious virus passed on between handshakes.

It is impossible to live without love,

It is the wind under our wings.

Essay #19 - Music

2^ND DRAFT FOR GRADING

Cassy

English

Mr. Salsich

4/8/10

Music: A New Perspective on a Love Story

1. Music is a thing of beauty that accompanies everyone differently. 2. Music can help people with their problems, help people with their self esteem, and help people figure out who they really are (tricolon). 3. Music describes stories like Romeo and Juliet to normal people like us. 4. It adds an upbeat mood to our daily lives.

TS In this paragraph these three songs by the All American Rejects are helpful to me- a unique band, they help me find who I really am (appositive). I have always savored (apt. thesaurus word) the lyrics and sounds that are produced by this wonderful band. SD In my life I have always relied on my friends to cheer me up if I was down. CM These lyrics from “Paper Heart”: “the leaves fall down, and so do I into the arms of a friend” show how I am socially in my life. CM Everything this band writes is raw just like me, what you see is what you get; I won't change my hobbies or personality for anyone. SD The lyrics in “Too Far Gone” really speak to me too: “wishful thinking, patience shrinking, bliss is far away, North is callin’, now I’m fallin’, at your feet”. CM This song reminds me that we all have “wishful thinking” about our dreams and we have to be patient to work towards the bliss that is far away. CM I appreciate this song because it makes me remember that I have many years of life left and I have a lot of time to work towards my dreams. SD Another favorite song, “Move Along” has hopeful lyrics, which I really enjoy; “another day when you’ve had your fill of sinking, with the life held in your hands are shaking cold”. CM Sometimes I just have to realize that I don’t need to wait anymore I can just start taking all the opportunities that cross me to achieve my dreams. CM I also relish this song because the whole theme of this song is about moving along in life and not holding a grudge and keeping things to yourself that bring you down. CS I will always be grateful for their music on Earth. The All American Rejects will either always get me through my problems or keep me in a good mood.

TS The situation of Romeo and Juliet is expressed in the song “Another Heart Calls” by the All American Rejects. SD In Romeo and Juliet their age is quite different from the age when we fall in love today. CM One line from the lyrics in this song fits the situation perfectly: “we were just two kids that took the moment when it was there.” CM The maturity (apt. thesaurus word) of these kids is very young for them to know when they are in love. SD Romeo and Juliet realize that this situation is very serious. CM There families express much distaste for each other- hate, only a blooming love like this can possibly fix it (appositive). CM Romeo and Juliet know this is no summer love, “I’ll never ask for anyone but you”. CS “Another Heart Calls” shows how the two lovebirds, “-remember when we stole the night”.

1. Life can only progress with music in our lives. 2. We learn new cultures of peace and love that we never knew existed. 3. The mystifying story of Romeo and Juliet is being deciphered through the modern language in the songs of today. 4. Music is a new perspective of how the people see the world today.

Self Assessment

1. One writing issue I am continuing to work on: I still think I still miss a few careless mistakes, that is why I try to read over my work very carefully.
2. One strong point I see in this piece of writing: I was especially proud of the special effects and I was also proud of how I related the songs very well (I thought) to Romeo and Juliet.
3. One possible weak point I see: I am not sure, but some of my punctuation might be a little incorrect.
4. The grade I would give myself: I believe I deserve a B+ because I thought I very nicely tied the song lyrics and the story of Romeo and Juliet.